i'm now 19

and 13 minutes.. well technically i was born at 2.40 in the afternoon Malaysian time on April 23, 1986.. so that would make it 6.40 pm NZ time.. so from 6.40 tonight i will be scientifically 19..

i reckon 19 is a big step from 18.. and i've felt it a bit more this yr.. the rebellion, the love feelings.. i guess it's a last teen spurt b4 the big 21.. have to get it out of the way.. but it can be v frustrating and stressful..

but that wasn't the case tonight.. and thank u guys who came over for my small party! it was a memorable time even if there was perhaps too much rugby for female tastes.. :) and the Highlanders beating the Canes in Wellington made it even sweeter.. thank u Nick Evans for a wonderful birthday present.. it was a small but v cosy party.. we had Matt, Shannon, Joe, Jess, Dan, Sam, Jane, Heather, Jarod Brown, Mike Reeves, Kirsten, Justin and Jiang over.. Justin, Kirsten, Mike and Jarod had to go early though coz they needed to be in Wanaka by midnight.. but it was still heaps of fun.. and tidying up lol.. pics will be up soon..

well it's likely to be a showery April 23 so should be fairly quiet tomorrow.. quiet start to the hols.. and i kinda need it coz have lost a bit of intensity over the last three days, esp after my Genetics test... intensity in studies and socially.. just need a break from all of that.. when i'm tired i start to become a bit negative... but all in all it was a p good week.. and a p good term..

good 6 weeks plus.. obviously when u're second year, u're more familiar with the pace of study and yeah it started p well.. of coz it got busier as the term wore on esp after Easter when i got two lab reports and a 10% summary all due in a period of five days.. then after that a GENE 212 test which was p hard but should pass.. worth 15 %.. i've got a Biochem test in the 2nd week and there's quite a bit to study.. but won't worry abt that till then.. and my Stats project..

but away from study, it started as a term of apprehension, u know having to get to know new ppl and familiarise with new faces.. but there was a bit of a cloud hanging over, trying to get over Jess.. it finally got to a point where u know i got sick of missing her and it kinda collided with the point that i realised i was prob going through a rise in lovey feelings towards gals.. and that equated to realising that i need to meet a lot more new gals in my life b4 i settle down.. sow my wild oats.. and yeap met quite a few new gals.. and found a new confidence in talking to any gal.. now it's a matter of taking those chances and finishing them off.. like Michael Owen or Ronaldo..

that was kinda my problem over the past three days.. saw Hanna but dint go up and ask her out again.. now have to wait for 10 days b4 can try my luck.. she lives in Dunedin but going up to her at the Highgate dairy is a nono.. it's just.. (guy silliness coming up) i'm just scared.. what if she cuts her long blond hair that i love abt her and goes for the short hair up to her cheeks.. what if she dyes her hair brown.. u know what.. she won't coz she's quite feminine.. and shyish.. and she's got a striped jersey..

anyway, apart from my lovey feelings towards Hanna which will grow strong as long as her blond hair, talked to some gals, like random gals in the Link, i.e. Claire, which turned out to be coincidential since she actually goes to Elim.. ermm.. then there's Laura, the American gal i've hung out with the last week.. starting to make headway.. and there are also guys.. Lester, Tom - who i hardly see in Gene the slacker :) -

so the lesson i guess is u can be much bigger than ur past and u can make the decision to overcome it if u want to.. and not be afraid of what happens.. coz if u can get to A surely u can do it again.. anyway here's to a good week off.. maybe pluck some apples in Roxburgh.. dunno.. take it step at a time..